Man Buns

So I am sitting in the back of my son’s car. My daughter-in-law, Shannon is riding with me and our husbands have taken on the driving and navigating challenges from the front seat. It allows Shannon and I to reflect on the world situation, such as it is.

Shannon: You know what a man bun is, right?

Me: (snorting derisively) Of course. Who doesn’t? Why?

Shannon: So what do you think of them?

Low "Pony Bun"

Librarian Man Bun

George Bush Man Bun

Athlete Man Bun

Man and Dog Buns

Top Knot Man Bun

I reflect on the Man Bun images that have crossed my path since they became "Official" in 2013. I feel I can adequately give my opinion based on the thoughtful survey I have just completed.

Me: Well, it’s like this. If a guy does not look good without a Man Bun, he is not going to look any better in a Man Bun. However, a really hot guy could continue to look really hot in a Man Bun.

This conversation, short as it was, sparked food for thought about ManBunDom in general. George even got interested. He photographed a man at Publix in a Man Bun. We eyeballed one from the window at Friday’s as we ate lunch. No Man Bun escaped our notice. (Disclaimer: I do not want George to EVER put a Man Bun on his head.)

My Internet research has proved there is a whole Man Bun World out there I was totally unaware of.

You can buy a ready-made Man Bun on Amazon for only 24.95. “Get the look without damaging your hair or spending years growing it out…Get the Man Bun look without the hassle.” It is described as a attachable hairpiece which comes in a variety of colors, made of artificial hair. The Man Bun is 3 in (diameter) x 1in (height). They do recommend pinning the Man Buns with a bobby pin with some of your hair layered to achieve the natural look.

And, guess what? There is an official Man Bun website complete with a definition of the Man Bun and the types of Man Buns there are. 

The Man Bun is a type of long hairstyle that involves tying one’s hair into a single bun to be placed upon the crown area of the head, or the vertex. The Man Bun may also be referred to as the Bro Bun, Hipster Bun, Mun, Dude Bun.

There is even a FAQ page with questions such as “How do I keep women from touching my Man Bun?” and “Can I grow a beard with my Man Bun?”

Leave it to my daughter-in-law, Shannon, to provide me with a topic that will keep me busy for hours on end. Thanks, Shannon, I am on my way to do some Man Bun scouting!

Being Thankful

As usual we went to a favorite restaurant on the beach to have Thanksgiving dinner. The food was excellent. We noticed that there were so many elderly people there, that it seemed like a nursing home Thanksgiving.  Walkers, wheelchairs and canes clogged up the aisles. Heaven help us if we should have to evacuate for a storm, the medical equipment alone would have caused us to trample each other in our quest to escape.

George is the Camera Dude.

It was a very windy day. We looked out the window toward the beach. There were a couple of kite things in the air, bouncing around in the wind. A man in a lawn chair was airlifted for a few moments, until he crashed back down to the sand. That was interesting.

What Thanksgiving Day is complete without getting beat in Scrabble by your oldest son? And having him play the ukulele for you? Life is complete.

Abbey watched with interest.

Telephone call from youngest son and wife and all is well with the world. Thanksgiving is all about the food and the feelings but most of all about the people you are with.

Abbey moved in closer.

The next day,  we spend time with Jeff at our current favorite place to eat. Tijuana Flats, which was originated by a UCF alumnus (where Jeff went to school.) Jeff lined up his hot sauce, prepared to dig in.

Yum!

Loved this time together. Wish Cory and Ashlee had been here also but another time....

A Visit With Uncle Bill

A Day With Uncle Bill

So when we got to Uncle Bill's, he was sound asleep. We used to take him to church on Sundays but he decided he did not want to go any more. I think it was because he likes to sleep late. He does not wake up till 1:00 PM or later.
Today the aide arrived and got him up. He is always confused when he wakes up and today was no different.
UB: Hey, did you hear what happened? The girl, the aide that was here the other night, got a call from the office. When she got there, a football player, a linebacker, threw her through a window. Broke both her legs."
I knew better than to get all upset. 
UB: Did you hear that the roads are all washed out up by Lake Okeechobee? It is flooding and is heading here next.
Me: I think we are safe.
UB: That is what everyone thinks. But it is coming soon and we are going to have to stay put in our homes with our storm windows up. It is going to be really bad. The mayor of Illinois came out and looked at the mess and said it was terribly bad. And he knows his stuff.
Me: (trying to change subject) Did you know that tomorrow is Cory's birthday?
UB: No, really? Where does he live?
Me: Texas.
UB: Oh, yeah. Well, tell him to stay away from the floodwaters heading their way. The water in Okeechobee is going to fill up the Mississippi and it will travel down to the Gulf and they are going to see more water than they ever have.
Me: Well, it is time for us to go. We will come by and visit you Tuesday.
UB: Well be careful and don't go to the Mississippi. Stay inland to be safe. Quite a ways inland.
Me: We will.

Vacationing with George

It has been a while since I have posted anything on my blog. Now that I am newly retired, I have more time for such things. Hopefully there will be someone to read my posts besides myself.

Our latest adventure was in going to Cedar Key, Florida. It is about 5-6 hours north of us (south of Gainesville). Unfortunately, using our GPS to get there caused us to add on over an hour to our journey. Evidently there is only one entrance to Cedar Key (it is an island, of course) and the roads that our GPS staunchly recommended took us in a circle around Cedar Key, but never closer. We had to get on the phone with my oldest son who became my human GPS and my hero.

Picture this scenario. The driver, George, is getting a bit surly. He is annoyed at the GPS, he is worried because we are out in the middle of nowhere, with no civilization in sight and we have less than a quarter tank of gas. There is no one around to ask for directions.

We pull into a wildlife sanctuary to look for the office. Closed on Fridays. (Guess what day it was.)
I decide to call my son for help. There is no cell reception in the useless wildlife sanctuary. We use a bit more of our valuable gasoline to travel back to the highway. So now we have no phone, no help, almost no gas and not much of a sense of humor for that matter.

Once we got a hold of Jeff, things started looking up. We were not that far from Cedar Key. And then when we found the only gas station near Cedar Key, we were ready for our weekend adventure.

Somewhere between the wildlife sanctuary and Cedar Key, the cares started dropping off our shoulders. We traveled on 4 bridges over water and then arrived on Cedar Key, a tiny spot of color and character amidst the tranquil blue of the Gulf of Mexico. We had the first good luck of the day and found a parking place right in front of our hotel. Lunch was first on the agenda. As we sat outside on the deck with seafood platters, we had no cares in the world.

Our second problem was that we had not prepared for cold weather. We could see the sunrise over the water right from our suite. Unfortunately it was freakin cold and we did not have the outerwear for it. Not even long pants, just shorts. I found George outside at sunrise, wrapped in a blanket and my sweatshirt which was way too small for his body, taking pictures of the sunrise. I spared you a picture of George but the sunrise was worth posting.

The rest of our trip was awesome. Cedar Key is unique...unless you fish, boat, or drink, there is not much else to do there. Our favorite thing was to talk to local people, who were interesting, kind and lots of fun. We would definitely go back.

Right outside our suite at the Harbour Master.

We met many doggies.

Last Cruise Words!

Go Figure!

Reflections on the people on a cruise: It always amazes me that there are people in the world who have a hard time just being happy.  On our cruise, I only noticed two Grinches. Out of about 6,000 people, including crew and passengers, I figure that is a pretty good percentage. About 97% or more.

Unfortunately, I ran across the path of these two women and that gave me some pause for thinking. It is quite a shock to be dunked into the myriad of deliriously happy and relaxed passengers who are just enjoying life and then run across one of these people. Let’s just say that cruising did not help them relax any. So they took it out on those around them!

                                           

                  

The Pissed Pee-er

The first lady was one I followed to the restroom near the theater. She first became annoyed because the wheelchair restroom, which she did not require, was locked because there was someone in there.

“Jesus!” she muttered.

I kindly pointed to the Ladies Room across the hall. She glared at me and headed that way. I think she wanted to continue to be inconvenienced and my helpfulness did not allow that. I noted the restroom and held the door for her. She refused it and got annoyed at me.

“I’m holding the door for you!” she said.

OK then. Once inside, wow!

This lady did not like the beautiful bathroom. She peed without any fuss, thank you, and started in again when she got to the fancy water spigots.

“Jesus!” she exclaimed as she managed the water. Then we came to the paper towels. Holy moly. She did not have the magic touch to have the paper towels come out of the machine.

“Jesus Christ!”

By the time she exited the bathroom, I was praying for her family on the cruise. Also praying I did not run into her again. Well, I did not. But at the end of the trip, the very end, as we were waiting to debark, Number Two reared her ugly head.

                                                                     

Thankless Person #2

She was using a walker, which is not an excuse for bad behavior.  But she was an angry person and took it out on the staff members who were trying very hard to meet her (many) needs.  Of course the staff members are all international, which is one of the charming things about cruising. She barked an order at one of the stewards. He did not understand her order.

“Can’t you speak English?” she rudely asked. That was it for me. Part of me wanted to run over and give her what-for but I felt it would embarrass the cruise staffers who had been so professional. So after she left, I just went over and commiserated with them.

Me: Hard to please someone who hasn’t had any for 30 years, isn’t it?

It was good to see them smile.

Cruise Neophytes

If we had taken our kids with us on the cruise, they probably would have been embarrassed at our lack of class. We took turns being bumbling fools. Sometimes we bumbled at the same time.

Jeanne’s Turn: As we walk into the ship for the first time, a staff member came forward with a squirt bottle and squirted the back of my right hand. I was surprised, was not expecting that. She smiled so I guessed it was a good thing and no one else seemed offended. What could it mean? A wet welcome to the ocean? Or would it dry and glow in the dark, our entrance and exit means to the amazing bars? Inquiring minds wanted to know so I went to another staff member who also squirted me.

Me: What is this stuff? (I held my hand up to my nose to sniff.)

Staff member: It’s hand sanitizer. Washee, Washee! Happy, Happy!

Me: Oh, cool. I get it. Glad to hear they are fighting the germ war! I moseyed back to George, attempting to maintain my dignity.

The squirters were everywhere all over the boat!

Jeanne Bumbles again: I had (note past tense here) a little casino fund that I saved for the trip. I was ready to use it. I sat down at the slot machine. It would not take my card or my money. I tried 3 more slot machines. Nothing worked. Frustration! I talked to one of the crew.

Crew Member: None of the machines are on. We are not out of port yet.

I looked around. How did I miss the fact that there was no one else but me in the casino? Bumbling fool indeed. I moseyed back to George trying to maintain my dignity.

George was a Bumbling Fool:  I find that George was trying to clip something on to his belt. I was noticing this because I was waiting for him so we could go to dinner and I was HUNGRY! Finally I asked…

Me: What are you doing?

George: Clipping on my flashlight.

I looked and yes, indeedy, he was clipping on the little purple mini-flashlight I gave him a couple of years ago. I did not expect it to come on the cruise.

Me: Why do you need a flashlight?

George stared at me for a brief time. I think he was trying to come up with a reason why he was wearing a flashlight on a cruise.

George: In case the boat loses power.

Me: Oh…

Luckily, it did not.

Later that night I noticed something.

Me: George, you have a light flashing in your pants. Is that your flashlight or are you glad to see me?

George: Well, that is embarrassing.

Jeanne: It certainly gives a new meaning to “Hot Pants!”

Jeanne Gets Yet Another Turn:

We go to watch an awesome show, titled Burn The Floor which is a very fast paced Latin dance show. We were in awe of the dancing quality and the fact that the girls wore these unbelievable high heels and don’t fall down.

On the way out, my own two graceful legs got tangled up in my purse strap, and my cane and it took me 5 minutes to be able to move again.

George and Jeanne Perform as Bumbling Fools Together:

On one of the island tours, George and I were arguing about a defunct sugar mill that we saw.

Me: It is the same one we saw back there.

George: No, it isn’t.

Me: Let’s ask the driver. Then you’ll see.

Me: John, is this the same defunct sugar mill we saw back there? (We had to explain defunct, which I think he suspected might be a bad word.)

John: Oh, no. This is a different sugar mill.

Me: (I was not pleased with his answer.) Curses! John, I will give you 5 bucks if you will say it is the same one. (all passengers are enjoying this conversation)

George: I’ll give you 10. (laughter from the peanut gallery)

John: No, that would be dishonest and there is no good to be had by achieving something through dishonesty. (He made me feel like a guilty politician for Pete’s sake. I decided to drop the subject!)

Lest you think that I ran out of bumbling fool stories, let me say that my writing space gave out before my stories!

Bumbling Fool #1 and #2

Cruise 2014

Norwegian Getaway Ship

Safety First

Before you can have any fun on a cruise, you have to do a Safety Drill.

George wanted to get ready for the Safety Drill. He dove under the bed to drag out the lifejackets. He made me put my arms up in the air so he could fit it on me properly.

Then he continued to read the directions.

“Jeanne,” he said. “It says here that we have to dress in warm clothes and bring all our medications.” I am picturing us layered in our tropical clothing, laden with our meds. I made an executive decision.

“We are not doing that, George. I am sure they mean in the case of a real emergency.” He was disappointed.

He was also a bit disappointed when the steward told us that we did not have to put our life jackets on for the drill. He wanted us to feel the peril.

We got to the Safety Drill area, which was coincidentally a bar. The steward told us that we must scan our guest cards carefully because EVERYONE has to participate in the Safety Drill. Those whose cards are not scanned have to come to a Make-Up Safety Drill the next day or the next or the next. George and I looked at the slate of events listed for each day and guffawed at the fact that there were still Make-Up Safety Drills the last day of the cruise.

“Hey, George!” “I laughed. “Ha ha ha! There must be some losers out there who still haven’t done their Safety Drill.” It did my heart good to know that we did ours the first day and those slugs who never do anything on time might be having to do a Safety Drill while we were dancing in a conga line.

So back to the Safety Drill. Rules for the drill were simple: No Food, no drinks, no electronics. They want you to pay attention to them, not your drink, not your wiener, not your cell phone. I thought it was a good plan. Then I saw why we teachers have so much trouble getting kids to follow rules.

A nice looking family sat nearby. Mom, Dad and 2 boys. The boys were both drinking sodas and eating chips out of bags. Mom was on her cell phone. A staff member came by and asked them to put their food, drink and cell phone away. They complied until she turned around. Then they all went back to what they were doing.

“Hey, Mom!” I wanted to say. “Thanks for the great role modeling.”

Omar, the Almost-Comedian, was the steward who presented the Safety Drill over the very loud microphone. He could be very annoying if you were not on vacation and were letting nothing bother you. He would remind us of the magical sound when the cruise line wanted to get your attention!

“Ding! Dong!” would go the very loud chimes over the P.A. You were instantly to become quiet and listen for important news. During the Safety Drill, he kept trying to keep over 1000 people in our area quiet.

Omar: I have a feeling the magical sound is coming again soon. Listen for the magical sound.

Jeanne: (to George) I am going to give him a magical finger gesture if he does not get moving on this Safety Drill.

Omar: Listen and be quiet. The magical sound is coming on again.

Ding! Dong!

After 45 minutes of waiting for everyone to arrive and be quiet, the Safety Drill lasted about 3 minutes. I blinked and almost missed it.